StokeReport User Surf Reports

ok so...

piss_shiver — Sun, 20 May 2012 07:58:11 -0700

So....what have you guys been doing when the surf is like this? Dont say travel. That doesnt count.
For mine own part I got an imac and have been learning xcode and objective c.

great surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Tue, 15 May 2012 09:23:23 -0700

SCRATCHYYYYYYY!!!!!!! I was the only guy out and there was a sole whale playing in the lineup. I couldn't believe my eyes, nor could I believe that I had gotten that close. I paddled over to it, and it ran away. Then sticker and this other guy showed up. We caught some blech waves but whatever, it's something to do, especially after a sleepless, perturbed night. I should have medicated but whatever I'm not like that. Sticker stuck around and a few minutes later we kept seeing bulbous buoyant barnacled bodies bobbing up and down, so I started to chase. Me and my bright ideas. We got to them and I shit you not, if we wanted to pet them, we could have. I was within ***10feet*** of a mother and her calf, but I decided to not touch them for fear of a breach due to spooking it. Absolutely amazing. Quite possibly the most amazing thing I've ever seen out there. I've seen whales before, but not that close. Contact made. Contact.

(Submitted via the Web)

New issue out

piss_shiver — Sat, 12 May 2012 11:54:58 -0700

New issue is out for the Pacifica Blogging Trannies academic journal.

fair surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Thu, 10 May 2012 09:53:09 -0700

Very nice today, a whale spotting, a dolphin reconnoiter, and a dragonfly pretending to be a parrot. Oh yeah there were some nice shoulder to head tasties for the taking too. Clean, but a little spring mixy, but it's May 10, so I'm not expecting much :) Go get some whilst you can. I may go out later too for the double, depending on the wind.

(Submitted via the Web)

Zoo rave kills dolphins.

piss_shiver — Mon, 07 May 2012 12:50:55 -0700

Possibly gothic dolphins, on smack.

fair surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Mon, 07 May 2012 10:29:53 -0700

Small fun in the sun. Found a peak that was breaking and paddled out at low tide. Few others out too. No wind, clear, and a nice respite from the howling of late. I wish there was more pulse, but I'll take the tiny clarity over victory at sea. Bring logs and or volume, or just drop later :) That's what I did. Also, yesterday someone stole my goddam sandals at the beach. Unattended doesn't mean unwanted. *FIST SHAKE AT SKY*

(Submitted via the Web)

Someone is a TV star!

piss_shiver — Tue, 24 Apr 2012 10:37:13 -0700

TV star or anger management issues, who knows. Gothic dolphins can't spray paint so I'm ruling them out.

Belgian dude gets after it and scores some tasty cold ones en seul. [video]

piss_shiver — Tue, 24 Apr 2012 09:55:32 -0700

Dig the euro beat.

poor surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Sun, 22 Apr 2012 08:30:51 -0700

Ultra craptastic. Stiff onshores, heavy fog, meager helpings. Could be a sunny hangover from yesterday. In/Out for me. Outside was worse than runny oatmeal, inside was a constant 2-3' barf fest, and I needed to relieve myself the whole session, so let's just say I got things in, out, and over with. Here's to the waiters....hope some high pressure, higher temps, and reversing winds happen.

(Submitted via the Web)

New floatation device helps new surfers in the Pacifica area. [video]

piss_shiver — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 08:45:43 -0700

New flotation device targeted to new surfers in the Pacifica Area.

poor surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 13:50:32 -0700

Well OH to DOH unadulterated punishment. 30min paddle. Heart in throat moments...then for f's sake, broke the damn board too. Couldn't find the other half. So long and thanks for all the thrusting. RIP El Gringo. Poor plus/Fair minus, due to shape. Most of the mackers were just quickly closing. Wasn't asking for big cotton candy, but I really didn't want the guillotine either! :( HARUMPH!

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Linda Mar

piss_shiver — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 09:28:37 -0700

Odd...vientos del sur con carne....There were a few ones coming in that made things fun, but it was a lot of sandpaper to the face. Solitary on the N end, no takers save myself. There were times where I thought I was in a white squall, just sitting there, blinded in the venting torrential white downpour. Saw a few black heads popping up, giving me that wry, inquisitive look. I'll call it maintenance and surfboard kiting, won't call it bad.

(Submitted via the Web)

A short trip.

piss_shiver — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 11:41:19 -0700

You need to read this.

good surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Mon, 26 Mar 2012 10:24:11 -0700

Some peppermints were to be had. Shoulder to overhead rollers coming in, on a clean driveway. Kind of hard to line up sometimes due to very consistent paddle battles. I guess that's why they call it surfing and not catch-a-wave, right? But when things lined up, and you hucked yourself over the ledge, you really could suckle on them peppermints for a while. Velly noice.

(Submitted via the Web)

good surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Tue, 20 Mar 2012 09:58:01 -0700

March madness?! Clean, smoothe, fun ones coming in. I wouldn't say it's 15' but at times, it's OH. I like how @sticker and I brought the fish out almost as cockpit errors, as it's definitely short-boardable :) Great times with some great waves. Want a throwback to our long lost winter? Best you go out today and see what's going on down memory lane, so make some cold grey hay while it's grey and smoothe :) heh. Good moins.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Fri, 09 Mar 2012 09:34:19 -0800

Pretty fun out there....Tiny Tasty Shapely again. Boats and guppies need only apply in my opinion. Go out and get some sun.

(Submitted via the Web)

good surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Sun, 04 Mar 2012 10:17:36 -0800

Petite, shapely, tasty. Was out from 6:45 to 8:30 or so and boy howdy was that fun. I had thought the tide would have flooded things, but the guppy pulled through nicely on the waves. Delinquent Dolphins making the rounds, Traceys grabbing rails, and a few other swell duders doing their morning thing. Go out and have some fun under the sun. Good minus because small can be beautiful.

(Submitted via the Web)

poor surfing conditions at San Mateo - Linda Mar

piss_shiver — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 09:23:48 -0800

After a week of no surf, beggars can't be choosers.....so we just got in. Sure we looked from North to South, but just couldn't find anything that was worth it, and Linda was the end of the line. What transpired was a few decent drops and then holding until closing. So a little fun face time was found, but not too much :) Worth it? Well I still believe I can surf after that session, so yes, I guess it was a session of affirmation and maintenance. Would I do that again tomorrow? Maybe, but I'm hoping for better.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 09:58:34 -0800

Scabies point in perfect solitude, but the waves were eh...I dunno. A bit mixed up, but breaking a bit further out than the second double pylon, which means it was pretty solid. HH+ on outliers, and a few shoulders could be had if you were fast. Good fun watching the sun rise. Love that place. Shot and beer and video poker with a pack of Winstons tempted me up the street, but I just went back home to shower.

(Submitted via the Web)

Finding Location Turtles [video]

piss_shiver — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:03:02 -0800

Can I get a rebel yell?

The SFOB Wacky Surfer Gym Collective

piss_shiver — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 10:56:47 -0800

What would you put in our theoretical gym? I'll start: (thumbnail open for business)

Wanted: Advice. Never snowboarded. Ever. Can ski/surf.

piss_shiver — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 16:33:03 -0800

Ok, so I got this free ticket to Sugar Bowl tomorrow....and I've never snowboarded. I'm going to burn one and try to learn. Can you summarize in a few words, what I need to do. Leaving thumbnail open for fun.

fair surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 10:08:43 -0800

Well...that was fun and interesting I guess. I dunno, if you like 1.5x to DOH waves at 12s, then I spose there's something to go for. I'm dumb AND pretty lucky so I guess that's why I actually made it out to the outside. While getting there though...yeah...1.5X pounders to the head on the inner bar, and once you make it past that, well you got the outside pushing real hard back at you at almost the same thunder. After finally finding a seam, and driving North towards Kannuckistan, it was go time! And by go time I mean try to catch a head and a half curling monster that shelves out and sucks your 5'10 out, and throws you off your board with a mogul of texture. Made it out, got bucked off. If surfing were easy they'd call it catch-a-wave. :)

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 09:32:02 -0800

Solid overhead pushing 2x. It takes a special snowflake to even try today. Being my usual self, I of course, was dismissive. Got out the 6'4 gringo thinking eh, no biggie.OK, biggie. Three mouseketeers put in where the crow flies, and after that it was a 6 bar full signal duck a l'orange slogfest. A few times we gave each other 'the look'. You know as you paddle out, and a huge folding meaty beast roars on the inside, and it makes you pause, and 'look' at your paddle partner in disbelief and dismay for confirmation. I even gave the roundup signal, but you know, stubborn me...never gives up a fight even if up against the ropes. So I pushed. And I got out. The next question is what now....I made it out, so now I have to actually DO something. I'm watching HUGE bombs just spray to the South. I see H20 in the pit to the South and I'm like 'wow, I'm glad I'm not there'. So my strategy to get back in was to get a tweener. Not a huge outlier bomb, but something imbetween in the pit. I move in and take the risk. Next thing I know I see a tweener building. Go time. Stand, yet I feel air...shit...then...thankfully board again...tha tha tha tha tha tha tha F YEAHHHHH!

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Linda Mar

piss_shiver — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 10:45:49 -0800

Really good time out there this morning. I looked at the wind projections, and the swell size/period and decided a trip down S would be best. Sometimes I get it wrong and sometimes I get it right. I got it right. LM was lined up, giving nice long rides, with not too many people on the peaks. Norteno side offered very nice head high rollers. Tucked into a few dead ends, but the size was saying it would be of no major consequence, so I stayed in till it got dark a few times. Went back down Southside for a second helping with a few friends, so it was a one and a half session morning :) Dunno why everyone was congregating there, but then again, I was alone Northside and that's just fine says selfish me. Good times.
Polished it off with a free coffee from Sbux because the barista took pity on me because the lady before me was executing a laundry list (no less than 10 fru-fru drinks). So I took my two bucks I saved and went next door to have the bear claw of surfer's revenge. Tore into that mothertrucker like a bear on a mission, digging into the hive....impervious and unabated by the swarm of stings. Fair+, standing on two hind legs, sniffing the wind.

(Submitted via the Web)

Solution for swamping....ring the bell [video]

piss_shiver — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 08:06:40 -0800

Worried about swamping? Bring your own bell.

Of note: Fear. [video]

piss_shiver — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 10:38:43 -0800

I thought this was of note.

good surfing conditions at San Mateo - Linda Mar

piss_shiver — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 16:05:50 -0800

Nah just kidding...Cronulla is about HH and glassy with some offies keeping the magic.
No wettie, just boardies and heaps of slatherings of creme. Boxing day should be better and more solid.
Hi from OZ!

(Submitted via the Web)

poor surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 08:09:19 -0800

Some serious HH groundswell is coming in from afar. However, up close, we have some gnar sideshore creating absolute havoc. Took the fish out, lost the fish. Swam back in. I found it at the shore, I knew it wouldn't bob around on the inside, because like I said, there's some serious push out there. Size isn't huge, but it's definitely got some punch. The walk of shame was absolutely MISERABLE. Colder than a witches tit out there. Claws barely could get me back into the house. Worth a paddle. You could find something. Poor+ rated on conditions, not lost fish :)

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 10:43:48 -0800

Big, clean, mean. Solid OH.
A little closey and explodey so sometimes you better go like you mean it and just hope for the best.

(Submitted via the Web)

New ads on the site make me chuckle....

piss_shiver — Thu, 24 Nov 2011 11:36:44 -0800

Gynomastia ad just now. Just clicked it. I'm giving my click dollars for the stuff that comes up like that.

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 08:50:56 -0800

Big, thick, burly fast HH wedges hammering though. A bit of "smooth" texture....not choppy, but some interference that was long enough to not really matter too much, but none the less, remind one of its presence. There were some nice big shoulders if you shopped well. Perfect solitude.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 10:15:15 -0800

Hung out by some dudes that could really surf. I dunno I got inspired....someone drew a picture of me on a wave that I thought was barrelling.
Oh right, conditions were slight offies, HH with HH+ on outliers. Go have some fun.

(Submitted via the Web)

Paddle Out For Maria Photos

piss_shiver — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 21:06:06 -0700

We paddled out for Maria at Pacifica, Linda Mar. A little dreary, a little happy under grey skies.

great surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 10:31:42 -0700

Ok, so....stiff offies combined with head high plus tasty wedges that absolutely held up. Some of the longest rides I've actually had at da beach. I found a peak nearly to myself for a while this morning and didn't even bother running with the pack because as I tried, more goodstuff(tm) just kept on coming in where I was, so what the hell did I want chasing the pack down anyway? :) Such a pleasant surprise, and very rare. I'm sticking with great here even though I didn't get into any stand up fit a bus in it barrels. Two turn, climb highside for what seemed like miles, speeding down like a bat out of hell. Great.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 10:06:38 -0700

Chest to shoulder cub paws to be had. Extra fun on the reverberations, which gave you the slap chop right into the waves, and whilst on them, some bucking bronco action.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 11:00:44 -0700

Solid peeling and steep shoulder to head lines coming through at the right places. Solid solitude, solid fun. A few gambles paid off, leading to some getting radical, which ultimately lead to boosts (very rare from mine own part).

(Submitted via the Web)

Memorial Paddle Out for Fellow Stoke Reporter on 10/30 At Linda Mar

piss_shiver — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 14:37:14 -0700

Cali by handle, Or Maria Pease if you knew her in person, succumbed to lung cancer. I had surfed with her many times at Ocean Beach with our very special crew. Maria was a very special person. She was absolutely fearless, and had the tenacity that it took to surf OB. I have seen some remarkable things out at OB, especially when it's gotten big.

SUPER NATURAL [video]

piss_shiver — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 14:29:12 -0700

Go to see Super Natural from Powerlines Productions!

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 09:47:27 -0700

North seemed a bit mixed up and potentially susceptible to wind, so we trekked down South and found HH to OH mackers completely pounding and then spouting cascades of fury. Some shoulders were had, and of course, a few beatings. Lost the board after my first right that I painted the face on, while trying to paddle back out. 'Oh shit' moments were the theme of that paddle out. The first was realizing there was no way to make it over like my friend fatnewt, the second was yes, this wave was going to absolutely lip me, and there went the board wee wee wee all the way home. Three gurgles later from the same punishment yielded a suited me, on shore, redoing the leggie. Went back out of course, but not without some internalization of what just happened. Power, respect.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 09:39:11 -0700

Shoulder to head ramps under grey skies at scabies point, with no one else out. Not even dog walkers, just some salty casters. Saw an argument in a Ford between a scrawny lady and her toothless man that was making me think about the detriments of methamphetamine use. Perhaps the argument started up the street a bit. Anyway I paid it no mind and just put in, hoping my underwears would be safe. They were.

(Submitted via the Web)

Pachecrow and Stacey in the yard.... [video]

piss_shiver — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 16:41:43 -0700

Just chillin

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 19:16:54 -0700

Took the fish out for a little spin but what I really didn't get the memo on was that the juice is pretty much loose! Solid OH+ bizzombs that were kind of top breaking making easy entry followed by the major whapau sauce. If you had the muster you stayed on. If you didn't then it probably would get you anyway. Barrell dodging? Nah...just getting away from the board which was about to be enveloped in a brown slough of sand and spitting anger. Mr fat newt had the drop of the day that turned his suit into a shortie. Couldn't hold it...too angry! Go get some while there's some pulse.

(Submitted via the Mobile Web)

good surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Thu, 08 Sep 2011 15:48:13 -0700

Absolutely magnifico gorditos out there. Took the twinny out for a spin on some soft HH rollers and boy howdy that was what the Dr. ordered. 3 turn 200yrd dashes. Insane. I had this surfers sense that I should skip the dawny, work from home, and then go out later. PAYDIRT. Dunno what it's doing right meow, but if it's anything like it was...you won't be disappointed.
Bring a fish, log (yes, completely rideable on a log today for big kahuna points ah hoo oh hee oh ho), or go retro on your fatty single fin. You know that 6'10 board that's for sale? Perfect for today as well. If it's fat, ride it.

(Submitted via the Web)

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Wed, 31 Aug 2011 09:44:16 -0700

OH+ on sets (that's two surfergurrrrls on the kilpatrick scale :) )
Really fun out there so if you like bbw's you may consider a sneak attack.
Took out the gringo and it did the trick. A few too steep and fast to crank a hard bottom turn on :)
Yep that's how much fun it was! Try to get it.

(Submitted via the Mobile Web)

SHE-RA, The punisher, Sold.

piss_shiver — Fri, 26 Aug 2011 11:56:50 -0700

7'8" Highly concaved pulled back pin tail. Thick as shit. Means only one thing. I may get my ass into some big trouble this winter. Who knows.

poor surfing conditions at San Francisco - Ocean Beach

piss_shiver — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 07:12:36 -0700

As per predictions, we have meager beaver conditions. Skated to the front, noticed a very light wind blowing over the greyish blue water, under a monotone grey sky. I tried yesterday with the cousin platypus, and we had some light hearted conversation, but today I decided, would be a day of rest. I'll still ride the bike to the cube, and watch the cityscape roll by me on the way down. I'll wonder and marvel at what's down there: Wonder what will happen at work today? How long will it take me to get stuff done? Will there be a beaver jam at BART today? Who's going to make my burrito down there today? Questions. Only the day can answer them.

(Submitted via the Web)

poor surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 08:47:13 -0700

Lago de Pacifico. Very little going on. Platypus and I paddled out just because....because. We both got some bathtub rollers but if you expect more than that, you ain't gunna get it. Bring a rubber ducky if you're by yourself.

(Submitted via the Mobile Web)

Anyone up for this? [video]

piss_shiver — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 13:26:17 -0700

VAT?!

fair surfing conditions at San Mateo - Other

piss_shiver — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 08:44:36 -0700

Chest to shoulder burgers on tap. Sticker and Consciouspilot and I prenteded we were at backdoor with major claims with bikini clad gals watching in amazement. Ahhhh warm, sunny, awesome waves going off everywhere in Eden.

(Submitted via the Mobile Web)